231. How To Be Awesome At Controlling Your Thoughts

I didn’t realize until I had no choice
That I could completely control my thoughts.
Five months ago, my husband went into cardiac arrest in the ICU as we were holding hands. 
He survived it and I felt like I went from the lowest low to the highest high… Only to realize the journey was just beginning.
We had an uphill road ahead with surgeries and complications and failing organs and a long hospital stay.
And for the first week there was more bad news than good news and I was trying to support him and connect the doctors with each other and keep my kids life feeling as normal as possible.
When I had a few minutes of alone time… When I was driving to and from the hospital or to pick up the kids or before I went to bed… I would naturally think about worst case scenario.  Parker was just about to turn five and his dad his his hero what if…
And the little super power that I realized we all have… I just hadn’t really woken mine up yet… Was that we can completely control our thoughts.  
And this is what I did. Any time one of those worst case scenario, scary thoughts entered my mind I simply said… I don’t and fill the rest in.  I don’t do negative.
Or I don’t do overwhelm.
Or I don’t do worst case scenario right now. 
And it allowed me to not crumble at a time when I need to be strong.
And I’m not saying don’t feel how you feel because I believe in feeling your emotions 100% but… I think sometimes letting your emotions fly doesn’t serve you. 
In this case, if I broke down… the whole thing would be a disaster. 
Since then, I’ve used this in many different ways and often and it’s been so awesome for me. And I think it will be for you. Let’s go! 
-When my husband was in the hospital - people kept asking me - how are you keeping it together? 
I took my kids to a waterpark!  Because I could control my thoughts.  And it helped me to be strong.
-It’s like a really rational way at looking at your emotions and just CHOOSING what serves you. 
This is a hack you will remember! 
-When you start to feel in a way that you don’t want to… Start with I don’t and then fill in the emotion that is about to surface that you need to be tough with!! 
-I don’t know a lot of things 100% for sure.
Growth mindset vs. fixed mindset.
-But what I do know is this… the words we say and the thoughts we think create the environment that you live in. 
AND!  We have to protect our headspace and make that a huge priority in our lives. 
-I don’t do… 
Yelling at my kids 
Losing my shit 
Negative talk about myself 
Negative talk about other people 
-Feel the feelings when it makes sense!!  
-It’s a hack for not reacting in the way that you don’t want to.

AND a hack for not caring about things that don’t matter.
AND a hack for not spending energy on things you don’t want to.
AND a hack for not being a person you don’t want to be! 
-Like if you are about to yell at your kids.  
-Or say something rude to a co-worker. 
-Let’s unpack some of these.. 
-Procrastination - be honest with yourself… if you know you are putting something off.  
Say you’ve had this idea to write a book for the last 5 years.  But you just can’t start.  It never seems like the right time.
Wake up, decide you are going to eat the frog, hug the monster and say to yourself I DONT DO procrastination. 
And it’s out there.  You’re proclaiming it and then you proceed on without it. 
-Negative talk about other people. 
Saw a group of moms are chatting outside of school after drop off and someone starts a conversation that you can tell is leading to running another mom down.  In your head you say… I DON’T DO talking shit on other people. And you excuse yourself and get the hell out of there.  Even if you aren’t saying it, you don’t want to be in the space where people are.  It makes you involved and you don’t have the headspace for that.  You’re out here trying to be more awesome each day and learn and progress and spend time with your people! 
-It GETS YOU OUT of situations!!  
-I don’t do negative self talk. 
You’re getting dressed and your stuff isn’t fitting.  You start this whole… well if I wouldn’t have had ice cream every night in bed for the last 3 months I wouldn’t be in this situation where I hate my body.  NOPE!  I don’t do negative self talk.  Get your ass dressed and get out of there.  And then make the adjustments in your daily life if you need it but running yourself down only does harm- zero good. 
-This hack is GOLD because like all of my fav hacks.. you remember it!!

-Next time you are in a situation where you know things are better if you control your thoughts.. use this hack.
CHEERS to being more awesome by controlling your thoughts and protecting your happy headspace.  Because what we know for sure is that the words we think and say determine the environment that we live in.  And nothing is more important than that ❤️